Napa Farmhouse 1885™: roses

Thursday, May 1, 2008

gardening or meditation?

today was a perfect day..one of those days where....right in the middle of the day..i realized how happy and grateful i am to be "retired." why the quotes? retired is a funny word to describe my life. remember in one of my first posts i told you that after 25 years in corporate life i decided to take early, early retirement? i smile because it is not as if i get retirement benefits..i was too young to qualify when i stopped working. but my husband and i invested, saved and realized that we had enough to live on..now we certainly are not rich..but we just did not require more "stuff" and would rather be together than keep working to climb the corporate ladder..we just could not see the pay-off for us..and for our life. the funny thing is i am now starting my own very small business..just cause i want to...but this is totally different. for one thing..i am the boss..can i tell you how cool it is to say that? no one but no one can tell me what i should be doing..what i should be thinking...how i should behave..etc. all the "coaching" and "performance reviews" corporate life brings..yuck! and i can set the vision and mission and product assortment exactly the way i see it in my mind.."my brand"...now, on the other hand..my company is based in my kitchen...i have not yet opened the on-line store so no revenue..and i have no "people" so i do it all myself..but i am having a ball. i plan to write about starting a small business in another post..wow! what an education. how many of you work from home..or have started your own small business? what works for you? what doesn't?

but today's post is about taking the time to appreciate simply being at home..living life. i have been working hard the past month operating in "start up" mode for the business. ..but i am able to go to the gym in the middle of the day 3-4 times per week to ensure i take a break...i am able to cook dinner every night. now i love cooking so this is really cool..if you do not enjoy cooking this may not sound so wonderful...i can have a meeting with my business partner, (my husband, peter), in my pajamas drinking coffee, and i can take mose for walks throughout the day..he is the company's director of security so they are business walks :).. today i decided to take the afternoon and work in the garden. my roses needed pruning, it was 75 degrees and i said.."what the heck"..that was the whole point of retiring..finally being able to do what i wanted to do..when i wanted to do it. our farmhouse has a small rose garden in the front of the house and a few rose bushes spread around the side and back. there are 25 total..not a ton..but for a girl that lived in a san francisco flat for 15 years without a yard..it is enough. spring in napa can be tricky..there are always a few really warm days in january and february, so the roses are pretty well leafed out in march. march and april have a number of rainy days, a number of foggy days, some warm to hot days and cool..sometimes freezing nights. so the roses sometimes get really whacked out (love my gardening term?) they start blooming early..and frequently develop black spot and rust...o.k...if you do not garden i know i am probably losing you with this post..but hang with me for just a bit...back to the roses...

so, to avoid the rose diseases, it is important to keep them pruned enough to allow sunlight to hit all the leaves..at least this works for me. i noticed this morning that they were a bit overgrown and needed pruning and decided this afternoon was a perfect opportunity. i started pruning, mose sat next to me and moved each time i moved to a different bush..and before i realized it..4 hours had passed. you know what, i felt fantastic..relaxed, pleasantly tired, and really happy. i had been concentrating on the pruning..ensuring each cut was the correct cut..and just kinda zoned out. the roses looked great, i had come up with a number of ideas for the business, and i felt really good. i realized that this was one of the first times i had experienced gardening without a predetermined time frame. prior to retiring my life looked like this.... leave napa early monday morning and drive to my office in san francisco. stay in the city, away from my family, monday-wednesday night, work thursday until really late and then drive back to napa... work from napa on friday. this happened on the rare weeks that i did not fly out on monday morning on a business trip and return friday night. that meant that something like gardening had to be completed on the weekends..along with everything else..so i always was on a schedule..even on the weekends. i enjoyed gardening, but felt the pressure to "just get it done". today..no pressure.. i only finished half the roses but..no worries..i can finish tomorrow..or saturday..or whenever i want. i have never, ever been able to live this way. it just felt right to acknowledge how grateful i am for being able to enjoy everyday things like cooking, gardening, exercise, walking the dog..living a real life... and to commit even more to ensuring there is adequate time in my life to give back..and give thanks..for my life, my family, my friends, my faith...